Why?

Humans are by nature social creatures. We move and live in groups depending on our age and needs. When we are born, we cry when we do not see our mother. In school, we learn to socialize outside our home and discover the wonder of playing with friends as we discover friendship outside our home. During adolescence, we ignore our family and seek friends because they "understand." In college, particularly when you move away from home, friends really become family. We talk of parties and classes and relationships over breakfast late saturday morning (sometimes noon!). Friends comfort us when we fail an exam or have a broken heart. Friends (at least those who are true friends) support us when we have to have less fun to get better grades. Farther along in the future, our own families become our social network. A spouse, children, grandmothers and cousins are our world and the cycle continues for future generations.

Knowing this, it is hard for me to understand how we can be so close minded when it comes to making new friends. Once we have our circle of friends, no one can come in and the one who steers away is a traitor. I live in what, as far as I know, is the most populated city in the world. I am surrounded by people all the time yet it seems that the larger the city, the lonelier life can get. In small cities, new people are a novelty and are the most sought after friends while in larger cities, strangers are just that, strangers. We live inside our bubble where only our "circle of trust" can come in.

Why do we do this? Why can't a large city be open to new people? Why do we choose to live inside our bubbles and reject all those who try to break through? In a world connected with smart phones and social networks and messengers, why do we reject friendship when it is right in front of us?