The Birthday Project: 30 days, 3 countries, 29 acts of kindness

The Birthday Project began in 2010 with Robyn Bomar. She was celebrating her 38th birthday and decided to work on 38 random acts of kindness for her birthday. She posted this experience on her blog, and, with the help of Pinterest, became global. The response for her birthday was so positive that she began a non-profit organization that promotes acts of kindness for birthdays, holidays and just the regular day to day. 

I first encountered this idea on Pinterest a few days after my last birthday and kept it in mind for the following birthday. In retrospect, I should have started then. I consider myself to be a very fortunate person. I am a relatively healthy person with sound mind and body and who has been blessed to receive all the education and nourishing I could ever need and want. I have a wonderful family who I look up to and that supports me on whatever project or endeavor. My nucleus made up of my mom, grandma and two sisters has supported me as I ventured out to college, as I moved to Mexico, when I began working and had to produce plays and grade endless piles of exams, when I purchased my first apartment, my first dramatic break up, traveling, sickness, health, good and bad moods, and most recently, moving to the Netherlands and all that this entails.  I have more family that also supports me in every sort of thoughtful way with a simple message via facebook and promoting my blog. I have friends and cousins all over the world with whom I keep in touch with and who I visit and visit me. I have a wonderful cat named Mona that joined my life two years ago and has offered comfort, company and has even traveled on a plane for me. Last but not least, I live with a man whose good nature leaves me short for words (as puzzling as this could be to me). He believes in my projects, particularly my writing projects, more than I can possibly believe in them. He is quick to forgive and thoughtful in every aspect. In short, I am blessed beyond belief. My sorrows and bad moments cannot possibly outweigh this much wonderfulness (although I sometimes let myself believe that they do) as I know and hope is the same for those of you reading.

On Friday I will turn 29, and I have been keeping this project in mind for almost a year. I have asked friends and family to suggest acts of kindness so that the audience to benefit is diverse. A unique aspect I found to my birthday project is how diverse in location it will be. I think it is futile to do all 29 acts in one day so I have decided to make it a month-long project with the hopes that I will be able to do more than 29 acts and that many will benefit. I am starting in my immediate surroundings, with my neighbors in Geleen (Netherlands) who I know little of but who always offer a smile and a warm "Halo!" Riccardo and will be in Paris for my birthday so I plan to also contribute this goodness to Paris. Shortly after, I will fly to Mexico to spend the holidays with my family where I will finish this project. So I have 30 days to give back just a pinch of all that I have received. 

This month my posts will mostly be about this project and I hope those of you reading will join me and share with me an act of kindness you have done in your community. It just takes a couple of chocolates for a neighbor, coffee for the person behind you in line or in the table next to you, food for an animal shelter, a blanket for a homeless person, etc. I truly believe that a small idea that began with Robyn three years ago can make our world a better place. 

To read about Robyn's project and idea please visit her website: The Birthday Project

Black Friday

There has been a very amusing image circulating the internet saying "Because only in America people trample each other for sales exactly one day after being thankful for what they already have." The first couple of times that I saw it, I found it amusing and just laughed. I have gone to Black Friday sales the day after giving thanks. It seems that Black Friday has become such an integral part of Thanksgiving just like the turkey, mashed potatoes, pecan pie and football. People prepare, decorate, eat and shop.

As an outsider to this tradition of eating and shopping (my family has now only adopted the cooking and eating part), I have began questioning the idea of Black Friday. First and foremost, I remember being incredibly exhausted, hunting sales and dealing with unforgiving shoppers. Yes, I do remember buying cool things and being ready for Christmas gifts, but before Black Friday, I also bought cool things and Christmas gifts. Is there a real need to buy and trample each other?

I think we would all agree that the answer is no. No, there is no need to leave your family to go shopping. One woman that CNN interviewed said she skipped Thanksgiving dinner just to get in line outside Target although she didn't even need anything. She hasn't missed Black Friday sales for a couple of years and she seemed to be proud of this. Contrasting this story, the same CNN article also told the story of another woman who was in line to get one of the 50 TVs with discount. She is there not for herself but for a housing project that will benefit poor women with mental health problems. 

Regardless of the altruistic or non-altruistic motivation, these people were in line voluntarily. What about the employees of many stores such as Target and Wal-Mart that worked on Thanksgiving DAY? I don't think the extra pay is worth missing dinner with their families just to be mistreated by angry shoppers. The extra half hour per hour of pay is not even significant. Pizza Hut has recently been in the news for firing a store manager that refused to open Thanksgiving Day. Pizza Huts defense is that the manager quit, and the manager says he was forced to resign. Regardless of who did what, the man lost his job for wanting to his employees to spend time with their family. Where are our priorities?

So as I sit at home in the Netherlands, far away from Black Friday sales, in a town that before the economic crisis was a shopping point in Limburg, I am glad to be far from the sales. I am sure the store owners of Geleen would be more than happy to have their fair share of addictive shoppers boost their revenues, yet this has not driven them to focus on profit alone. Year-round, stores close between 5pm and 6pm and only open on "special" Sundays. People can easily have dinner with their families. No amount of shopping, sales or clothes can give you the warmth that family time does.

Happy Friday!

Happy Thanksgiving

Today is an extra special day for me. Today is a day to give thanks. This is something I try to do every day, but I like that in addition to that, there is a special day to give thanks.

I had spent the last couple of years preparing dinner for my family. I would make a delicious turkey, mashed potatoes, a different dish each year with sweet potatoes and another veggie dish. My sister would get dessert. Until last year she found the most delicious pumpkin pie in Mexico. My mom would assist me with the sweet potato and veggie dishes and with anything else that came up. My grandma was in charge of wine. We would set the table. Family would arrive with more desserts. We would wait impatiently for the turkey the last couple of minutes staring at it as if that would make it cook faster. Once the turkey was ready, my cousin would help with the gravy. He quickly became a gravy-making expert! Then we would sit and I would have trouble carving the turkey. I would swear that next year I would learn how to properly carve the turkey. Everyone ate delicious food. Everyone would be stuffed. A typical Mexican remark would be mentioned for my cooking, "Ya te puedes casar." You can already get married. After dinner we would have to beat my grandma to clean and do the dishes. It was a great event, probably bigger than Christmas.

This year, I am far away from my family and it didn't seem reasonable to make a whole turkey. There are definitely wonderful people to make it for, but the audience of this feast is my family. Only my mom puts up with my moodiness as I try to do everything on my own and become the dictator of the kitchen. Only my sister would drive all over town getting all the last minute things and still dress to impress. Only my grandma would not pay attention to me when I told her she could not do the dishes. And yet I live with a wonderful friend and partner for whom I would like to make this wonderful feast. I went to the grocery store early and was lucky enough to find a nice thick turkey filet. I will prepare it as closely as I can to my turkey recipe. I will make a small portion of mashed potatoes, grilled veggies and I bought some delicious French bread. We will have a small Thanksgiving dinner just us three: Riccardo, Mona and me. We have a lot to be thankful for and tonight we will dine and drink to that.

This year has been especially great. I am a very fortunate person because even though life hands me a couple of hardships to overcome every once in a while, once the storm is gone, there is plenty of sunshine. Since last Thanksgiving I have made new friends and re-kindled with old ones. I have traveled and eaten delicious food. I have had friends visit me in Mexico. I have started to learn a new language (5th one)! I have moved half way across the world for love. I have walked around four countries in two weeks with my mom and grandma. I have become even closer to my baby sister. I have taken up writing seriously. I have learned to travel in trains and how to dress for cold weather. I have made a wonderful new home with Riccardo and Mona. I have learned so much about myself and I am working to become a better person. It has been a wonderful year and all that I can do is say thank you. Thank you to God, to life, to my family, to my friends.

I am very fortunate to have family all over the world, and, although I would very much like for everyone to live nearby, they are all in my heart. Everyday. Everywhere.

Happy Thanksgiving and Happy Hanukkah!