Open Heart, Open Mind

This morning, as I was reading Tsoknyi Rinpoche's book "Open Heart, Open Mind" with a cup of coffee, I came across the following quote that truly reached out to me: 

"One of the great obstacles we face in life is our tendency to surrender very quickly to various knots of thought, feeling, and physical sensation, accepting them as truths that keep us from taking the first step onto our own bridge."

The reason why this quote spoke to me was something I've been pondering about since Friday night. On my last post, I wrote about my project to take on 29 acts of kindness and the reasons behind it. I had a couple of things I wanted to do and was working on the remainder of my list when something dawned on me. Nothing on that list had the potential to truly transcend. I am not trying to be cynical and say that we must do big things for big changes. I truly believe small changes have a lasting impact, but my question with this project is, "What can I do, big or small, that will have the highest potential to reach the greatest number of people?" Yes, buying a cup of coffee for a homeless person during the winter season is something great and could very well help that person beyond what I will ever know. However, the initial intention of this project had no room for enduring changes. In December, I am sure I would buy several cups of coffee for several people, I would donate food and time, etc.. What would happen in January once I had completed my 29 acts of kindness? How long could I truly keep this up?

This dilemma kept me frozen on what to do to complete the 29 acts. Nothing I came up with seemed really transcendental, and then a wonderful message reached my phone. The message itself was nothing extraordinary, but the sender was. This person is someone with whom I show little tolerance for and who always seems to be distant from me. I keep in touch with several friends around the world, but this person never makes my list. It was with this message that I realized what I needed to do to make this project reach more people, and it is based on a simple idea: Start with yourself.

One year ago, I was fortunate enough to take a meditation retreat that truly marked me. I am not a "hard core" meditator nor do I even consider myself to be Buddhist. However, these four meditations I learned, the Four Immeasurables, truly spoke to me. In short, these are four meditations that for me are the basis for life: Loving-Kindness for ourselves, friends, acquaintances and enemies, Compassion  for ourselves, friends, acquaintances and enemies, Empathetic Joy for ourselves, friends, acquaintances and enemies, and Equanimity. These four meditations do not even require us to sit alone in a cushion for 24 minutes. The idea of these meditations is to put them in practice with everyone as we are interacting with them. We should feel loving kindness for everyone we meet as if they were someone we cared about (parents, children, spouse, etc.). We should feel compassion for all those who are suffering even when we cannot understand or care for their suffering. We should rejoice in the good fortune, success and happiness of everyone and we should maintain equanimity as we interact with others. The most beautiful aspect is that these four principles are at the core of every religion and ideology.

So from twenty-nine acts of kindness, I narrowed it down to four that I will constantly work on not only this month, but throughout my life. I will still work on random acts of kindness for people and animals in need as well as those that may seem to not need it for this is yet another way to show loving-kindness and compassion. 

Perhaps it seems I took the "easy" way out, but I know I took on something much more challenging. I will learn to loosen the knots that my past experiences have tightly woven. I will keep looking within me until I find a more giving person, and, once I find that person, I will start all over again.

"Look at your life. Look at the ways in which you define who you are and what you're capable of achieving. Look at your goals. Look at the pressures applied by the people around you and the culture in which you were raised. Look again. And again. Keep looking until you realize, within your own experience, that you're so much more than who you believe you are. Keep looking until you discover the wondrous heart, the marvelous mind, that is the very basis of your being." -Tsoknyi Rinpoche